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Sally Hodgson - Passion Personified

2/4/2014

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Expecting her first child in 1958, Sally Hodgson faced a challenge that few new mothers do. While she was about to bring new life into the world, her beloved fifty-one year old mother was dying. With five children in the family, two were still at home, a daughter of ten and a son fifteen. Being the oldest daughter and a nurse, Sally desperately wanted to spend more time with her mother but the culture of the day around death and dying kept her mostly here in Port Alberni while her mother was dying in her home near Qualicum.  

Sally’s sister, a student nurse, took three months off to be with her mother. But, being 1958, people didn’t know how to talk about death or were intimidated by the word “death” thus it wasn’t talked about with their mother. Children were to be protected… they are too young to handle death.

A week before Sally’s baby was born, her mother died. As time passed, Sally lived with the guilt of not being there for her dying mother. She took in her little sister with little understanding of a child’s grief, thus adding to her guilt.

In 1982, as hospice /palliative care became the growing practice for care of the dying, Sally was employed in the Home Care Nursing program. Although she had her own fears about caring for the dying patient, Sally met the challenge by learning as much as she could in this new field. Armed with growing knowledge about the dying process and the needs of the dying, Sally was invited to sit on the board of the Alberni Valley Hospice Society in 1985. 

“Perhaps I was motivated by the unresolved guilt I felt around my mother’s death. Whatever, it was, I felt this was the place I was supposed to be… this was the work I was supposed to be doing. I took every opportunity to get extra training. When Doctor Mary Brown, a force in the field of palliative care in Canada, came to Nanaimo, I was spell-bound! Soon, Sally was immersed in the training of volunteers in the ever-expanding Palliative Care Program of the AV Hospice Society.

Her love of training volunteers and being with dying patients became an absolute passion and kept Sally motivated with the AV Hospice until her very recent resignation.

Fueled by her passion, it became Sally’s mission to educate people on the process of dying to help them understand that it is a critical and natural stage of life. It is an opportunity for growth as priorities shift dramatically to what is really important and vital emotional and spiritual work can be done, both by the dying person and by the family.

“The purpose of hospice care is the provide comfort and support so that the work of the final journey can be about living while you are dying. It’s about listening to concerns, cares, hopes, dreams, fears, anger and anything else that is on the dying person’s mind - without judgment or censure.

Whenever I have the privilege of being with a dying person, I always feel that I am on sacred ground.” Sally concludes.

In 2007, Sally received a life-time membership for 25 years of exceptional ground-breaking service. Presented annually, it is now the Sally Hodgson Award granted to those  volunteers whose time and effort devoted to the AV Hospice Society makes a significant difference to the local landscape of palliative care.

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Through Loss Graham Finds A Purpose

10/19/2012

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Of the eighty active volunteers who work with the Alberni Valley Hospice Society, four are men. One of these is Graham Hughes, who possesses an array of experiences in human resources, volunteerism, advocacy, and the grieving process.

During his childhood, Graham faced several significant losses: a friend died in Cameron Lake when the car he was in plunged off the road, one was struck by a truck, and another died in a tragic accident.

Around the same time, his father was diagnosed with amyloidosis, a condition wherein amyloid proteins are abnormally deposited in the vital organs. In 2000, Graham and his sister were temporarily placed in foster care while his father underwent a heart transplant. His father lost his 10-year battle with the condition in 2004. Two years later, Graham’s mother passed away as a result of prolonged substance abuse. A month after that, Graham sustained a spinal cord injury.

While he had little understanding of grieving process theory in those formative years, Graham credits the security provided by his faith, his grandparents, and his foster family, for giving him hope and promise during the difficult times. He also believes these losses were what helped him find purpose.

While doing a social work practicum in 2005, Graham began facilitating for Rainbows for Children, a grief and loss peer support program for youth ages 4-13, offered by the Port Alberni Family Guidance Association. “This was when I first became aware that you can help people through the grieving process by just showing up as yourself and letting them express what they feel. I didn’t have to be ‘fixer’…I didn’t have to have all the answers.” Graham recently became coordinator of the program.

In the spring of 2011, Graham took the Palliative Care training course. He currently holds two weekly shifts in Ty Watson House, and is the newest member of the AVHS Board of Directors.

“What draws me to Ty Watson House is the unique level of commitment and dedication that I see in the staff and volunteers. Some volunteers have been with the Hospice Society for over twenty years. Every person that I have met in the society is caring and committed to making not only the community, but the world, a better place. Many of our volunteers belong to other organizations, allowing us to build bridges across the Valley and beyond. The Hospice Society is filled with people who continually inspired me. I am honored to be part of something so big.”

Philosophically, Graham closes: “I have had my own experiences with serious illness. It changes how you look at life; you don’t put things off as much. You realize that you need to do the good you can in the time that you’re given, and only God knows how much time we’ll be given, so if there is something you can do to make the world a kinder, safer, healthier place…do it now.”

Sharon Hillman, a retired educator, is a trained volunteer with the Alberni Valley Hospice Society. She harbours a life-long interest in people and their individual stories. She can be reached through Ty Watson House at 723-4478 or throughinfo@albernihospice.ca. An archive of all Sharon’s columns can be found at www.albernihospice.ca


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Fundraising For Ty Watson - The Never-Ending Quest

11/1/2011

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Operating Ty Watson House without dedicated government funding, leaves the Alberni Hospice Society with a daunting challenge every year. While VIHA funds the medical component of the House’s services, the operation of Ty Watson House and the additional hospice programs, including bereavement services, depend entirely on the generosity of the community.

A very active fundraising committee hosts annual fundraising events that are gaining prominence as awareness of the significance of Ty Watson House grows. The Black Ty Gala and the ATV Raffle were huge successes again this year. This month saw the appeal to “Friends for Life” launched. Indeed, the very first “profit for non-profit” society in Canada, Pot Luck Ceramics, was borne out of this hard-working committee.

Throughout the three and a half years that Ty Watson House has been operating, members of the community, including several business owners and many small groups of socially-conscious people, have also stepped forward with creative fundraisers. On occasion, an enterprising and energetic individual will take on a project alone.

Such is the story of Anna Maria Gaiga. For three years, Anna Maria has raised funds for Ty Watson House by selling plants from her home.  This year she added a new component to her sales. By making the ethnic delicacy of rum-infused crostoli pastry (a grueling four-hour process) and selling it door to door, she raised another $1000 dollars to bring this year’s total donation to $3020.

Surprisingly, gardening and baking were not part of Anna Maria’s childhood training in her home town of Friuli in Northeastern Italy. She was raised by nuns in a Catholic boarding school and home crafts were not part of the curriculum. “I learned to love reading, especially about archeology, astronomy, gerontology and history”, she says with a bright sparkle in her soft blue eyes as she cuts up organic celery from her garden for her four-year old great grandson who, along with her six grandchildren, is the great love of her life.

“When I met and married my husband, who came from a strong agricultural family, I felt that I did not fit in…in fact, I think they really wondered about me,” Anna Maria laughs. “I wanted to be accepted by this wonderful, large family and was determined to embrace the domestic arts.”

Her vast garden, her well-appointed home with its numerous petit point tapestries and the rich tomato sauce simmering on the gleaming stove attest to her success.

Anna Maria’s interest in Ty Watson House was a natural evolution from the volunteering that she had been doing in the community, specifically with the Women’s Resource Centre, the Salvation Army and visits to Fir Park and Echo Village. She has also supported friends and family members in their elderly years, an interest that was evident even in childhood. “I love people.” She humbly shrugs, “It is no big deal…it’s just who I am…I am drawn to children and the elderly who need love, understanding and support. I am especially fortunate that my husband supports the charitable endeavors I get involved in. He’s proud of me. He’s a good guy.” 

With her plants all divided and ready for the winter, allowing them to be especially robust by the spring, Anna Maria will hold a final plant sale in 2012.


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The Kitchen - The Heart of Ty Watson House

10/1/2011

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Entering Ty Watson House at any time, you may be beckoned to the well-appointed kitchen by the tantalizing aroma of apple pies baking in the oven, wafting intoxicating hints of cinnamon. Or you may be drawn by the pleasant hum of chatter as residents, staff and volunteers gather round the table. More often than you might expect, you could well be drawn there by the melodious strains of laughter that float out over the conversations. Like the kitchen in any other house, the one at Ty Watson House is the heart of the home. Like any other home, the centre of food and sustenance is a source of comfort and well-being.

The many dark-stained cupboards, the multitude of modern appliances and the bevy of utensils signal the efficiency of a well-run kitchen. The sturdy table draped with a bright cloth topped by a lacey runner and a large bouquet of fresh flowers along with the bright floral-print valances on the generous windows and the touches of artifacts sitting atop the cupboards speak of a caring attention to detail. Only a sign-in sheet that must be signed by all who enter and the large tack board announcing who is on shift, along with other critical data of the day, hint that this is more than a residential kitchen.

Like all kitchens, it is the people who truly make this one home. Gail Koehle and Diane Kumagai are the two paid supervisors keeping the kitchen operating. They share much more than their collective twenty hours a week. They are both graduates of the forty hour hospice training course. And, while they each have distinct personalities and a unique area of expertise that contributes to the compassionate care of the residents, they share an  infectious, humble warmth and generosity of spirit that sets the tone for the kitchen and permeates the House.

The fifty other kitchen volunteers, many of whom have been volunteering since the House opened in January 2008, contribute to the peaceful, heart-warming ambiance of the House. Six of the kitchen volunteers are men - a great bonus for the many male residents who appreciate a little foray into manly topics of conversation now and then. There are five two-hour shifts to be filled each day – a daunting challenge that can only be met when you have a bank of dedicated volunteers who are committed to the task week in and week out.

The over-arching commitment of all the volunteers is to use their creativity and expertise to the best of their abilities in service to the residents and their families. The residents are consulted on what they would like for a meal and every attempt is made to fulfill each wish. If a resident wishes to have ice cream at each meal, ice cream will be served. One gentleman with a sophisticated palate asked for Grande Marnier rum balls and Steak Tartar. Fingers flew on the computer as recipe sites were diligently searched and eventually Grande Marnier rum balls and Steak Tartar is what he got!

Residents are also encouraged, if they have the energy and show any kind of interest in being involved in the workings of the kitchen, to lend a hand. Some fold tea towels or peel potatoes. Some offer their own favourite recipes. There is a growing, treasured legacy of recipes from residents who have passed on, each bearing the name of its author. Like any home, this kind of time spent in the kitchen is very pleasant and leads to comfortable conversation, allowing the staff, volunteers, residents and their families to get to know each other, making the residents’ time spent at Ty Watson much more homelike.

Speaking on behalf of the volunteers, Gail Koehle sums it up, “The rewards of being a volunteer in the Ty Watson kitchen is not so much about the kitchen itself as it is about the relationships you form in that kitchen. Getting to know the residents and earning their trust so that they will share this most intimate and vulnerable time in their personal journey is a huge, huge honour. Though not all residents may let you in, when they do, it is a most rewarding connection, a true blessing.”

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"Story Lady"

9/1/2011

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On the corner of Second Avenue and Stirling Street stands a well appointed stately house, a reminder of a genteel era when houses of this construction signified that a person of community stature lives within. Indeed, for many years, inside these walls resided the Watsons - Mr. Ty Watson, a prominent local pharmacist and his wife, Virginia. Ty Watson, a man of generous nature and community-mindedness, upon his passing deeded the house to the Clayoquot Continuing Care Society to be used as a “place for seniors”. This house eventually, through much trial and tribulation, became the beloved house of hospice, “Ty Watson House”.

I was first introduced to the house in the fall of 2008 when my mother-in-law, Nancy Hillman, took up residence there for the duration of her final journey. It is during her nearly four month stay that we, as a family, began to understand that this is no ordinary house. Indeed, it is a home…a very special home filled not only with every comfort but one that is also filled with peace, joy and love. It is a home that weaves the old with the new and the medicinal with the pastoral into a rich tapestry of convenience, community and care.

While in this caring home, Nancy’s legacy began to take shape as she dictated to me several letters for her two little great grandsons who live in Guadalajara, Mexico. In her “Letters to Diego and Emilio”, she told the boys of her full life on the farm in Buchanan, Saskatchewan. She told the story of how she and her ten siblings grew from hard-working farm children into fine productive citizens, who spread out across Canada and the United States, one sibling even reportedly working for NASA – all were musicians, all were great family people. She told them of her father, a renaissance man who was a trained teacher, a historian and a politician who worked alongside the great Tommy Douglas. He was also an inventor whose registered hybrid crabapple and plum trees are still grown in Saskatchewan today. She spoke of the birth of her own children and related tales of their growing up years and of their current families…all accompanied by evocative photographs. She described in detail many of her travels and her other interests. Through the telling of her story, which eventually became a sixty page odyssey of love, Nancy shaped her legacy in her own mind, receiving a deep satisfaction that her life had, indeed, been filled with meaning and purpose.

It was a profoundly gratifying experience for me, as well, as I learned of the rounded character of the family into which I had married. It also helped the staff at Ty Watson get to know Nancy a little better, as she was, by nature, a private person, not easily given to sharing the details of her life. With her permission, we left the daily print-outs of her story by her bedside. As the story evolved, the staff slowly gained an insight into what really made Nancy tick and she gradually began to make friends with the staff as she found a new trust in their care and companionship.

After Nancy’s passing in December, 2008, I left a copy of the published book at Ty Watson House. Lynn Turner, the then Executive Director, called me in to have a conversation about Nancy’s story and about the implications that it could have for the House. She suggested that this kind of sharing of one’s life story is a service that we might offer to all the residents and their families at Ty Watson House and in the palliative care community at large and she thought I could do it. Lynn, a force of nature, attested to by any who know her, immediately dubbed me “The Story Lady”. I have to admit that this is a little like being anointed by the Queen of England…you are honoured but more than a little overwhelmed at the same time. Eventually, after several more conversations with Lynn and Theresa Maxmenko, the Hospice Services Coordinator, and with the blessing of the new Executive Director, Erin Girling, I tentatively agreed. Following several weeks of highly valued training in palliative care, I whole-heartedly agreed.

The ultimate vision of offering this confidential service to residents and their families - to have their personal story shared for their own purposes - is in its infancy as we continue to work out the details on how to develop the service.  Meanwhile, we also recognize that there are a multitude of stories that abound within the walls of Ty Watson House and within the community of care throughout the Alberni Valley that can be shared with a wider community audience. Henceforth, once a month in these pages, this newly dubbed “Story Lady” will be relating tales of valour, strength, courage, humility, determination, compassion and much, much more. Through these stories, we hope to reveal the profound humanity that is the glue that holds Ty Watson House together and to allow you, the reader, to more fully understand and appreciate the value of hospice care as a whole.   

If you have a story to share, please don’t hesitate to contact me, “The Story Lady”through Ty Watson House: 250-723-4478 or email me at info@albernihospice.ca  - Subject “Story Lady”.

Hospice Services are dependant on the financial support of the community.

Check out the “Potluck Story” at www.potluckceramics.com to learn about a unique and innovative community interest business that supports Ty Watson House through you, the community.



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    Author: Sharon Hillman

    A retired educator, Sharon hopes that her life-long interest in people’s stories will translate into expanded awareness of Ty Watson House and the services of the Alberni Valley Hospice Society.

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Alberni Valley Hospice Society
2579 10th Avenue
Port Alberni, BC  V9Y 2P5
(250) 723-4478

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